So Things Didn’t Go As Planned, Now What?
At that point in your life where you never really knew what you wanted to do with the rest of it, did you imagine that you would be where you are today? Did you make all the right decisions that got you to this point right now? Let us be real for a moment, we all come to a point in our life where we are prompted to make a decision that feels like it would change our lives forever. Some of us overthink things to make sure that we know everything about a particular situation before making that decision and some of us don’t really think at all. But whatever decision is eventually made, these tend to work together to set the pace for the direction that you will gain momentum in. So, are you where you want to be in your life?
Whenever we follow through with a particular direction, be it good or bad, we face a whole lot of unpredictability along the way. Whether we realize it or not, the things that we face get us further down this path. We could invest years of our life making decisions that push us down a path that we really wish to follow or not. But regardless of the path you do choose, you will certainly be walking through something you’ve never faced before. You will experience situations that you never thought existed. You can allow these situations that you face to happen to you and discourage you from ever pursuing it any further, or you can let it happen for you and allow it to serve as fuel to push you further down this path. You could become another statistic and tell people why they should also become another statistic or you could be the reason why people believe in the future of humanity. You are where you choose to be at every point in your life, so realize that you may not make the best decisions in your life. You may make a whole bunch of mistakes and you may not realize it until it seems too late to turn back. Situations are not always ideal, but if you allow it to teach you, you may be able to better handle situations to come.
“No matter how bad things are, you can always make things worse.” ― Randy Pausch
One of the things that used to scare me when I was growing up, was what I was going to do with my life. It’s something that I was asked as a kid and I would brush it off by often saying that I didn’t know. Then I started to tell people that I would become a lawyer because I heard my friend saying that that was what he wanted to do. Terrible, right? But, I felt it easier to answer people this way. I used to think that those who do good become successful and those who do bad don’t. I would always feel this weird feeling whenever I would see people not having the best of lives. It was weird. Everyone around me would judge them, but I felt wrong doing so. I know we live in a world hell-bent on judging people for the choices they make. Good ones are usually celebrated whereas the bad ones are frowned upon. What a world we live in, where we are filled with people who critic others based on what they feel to be good or bad not realizing that these are subjective feelings!
I would always find it curious. I mean, how can we know what choices are right and wrong for someone else? Because in the end, we are all choosing to live our lives the way in which we choose to them, and the only person who has the conscious power to judge you is you. I would always look at two people and just see them as they are, a result of all of their choices. Who would I be to judge someone for the life that they choose to live? Maybe I made choices a bit differently, but I am trying to figure it out for myself just like every other person. I get up each morning and live my life the way I choose to, just like each other person. I have the same 24 hours each day, just like each other person. This is why I could never judge someone. Because if you had to look at it from a high level, we are all the same. People who are a result of their choices, choosing to live their lives in the way they so choose!
When you feel decisions not going as planned, remember that:
Everything Happens For A Reason
Wherever you are in your life, you are a result of your choices. Good or terrible, it makes no difference — for they all play a role in the equation of life. You may rejoice in those moments where you accomplish a goal that you set out to accomplish, and you may feel terrible when something unexpected occurs that forces your life to change a little — this is okay! These things that you face are meant to affect your life in some way, because this is you experiencing your life. I know, the terrible moments are quite convincing in their argument. They do tend to stick around much longer than they need to, and sometimes they are what we become. I don’t wish to be optimistic, telling you everything you have already heard like things would get better in time. But one of the quotes that stuck with me is, “This too shall pass.” To me, this means that regardless of what you face, good or terrible, it will eventually pass. Time has a way of decaying all that is no longer necessary. This may seem ominous, but this is far from so — this is real. So keep in mind, that you may not always understand why you experience the things that you do, but they can all serve you or haunt you. Everything does and will always happen for a reason.
Where You Are, Is Where You Choose To Be
I may not have had experiences so terrible that they should belong on the front page of a newspaper. But I have experienced my fair share of life and spoken to a whole lot of people. So much so that I know that it all breaks down to the fundamentals. You are where you choose to be. Whether you enjoy your life or downright dislike it, you are where you choose to be. Could you have done something differently? Smiled at that random person. Asked that question. Gotten up early or just went to the gym. You see, your life is this weird equation of everything that you have experienced thus far. You may not have had the brightest of pasts, but who could change that? I mean even Gatsby tried and I don’t see you throwing parties that often. Humour aside, everything that you choose to do, adds to that equation of your life. If it is imbalanced with too many bad choices from your past, then you have to balance it out with a whole lot of better choices. How do you know which choices are better? Well you don’t, you just know which ones are not the right ones and you choose accordingly. Take away your emotions and journey into the unknown. Stop becoming Albert Einstein’s version of insanity, by doing the same things over and over again, and expecting different results. The only person that you need to hold responsible for your life, is reading this piece right now.
Each Person Is On Their Own Journey
We as individuals live our lives individually. Yes, we do have people in our lives, but we are living our lives individually, making our own decisions, facing our own consequences and feeling our own feelings. We all want to figure out the way to best live this life and we set out to achieve this. We make decisions, impulsively or well thought out, and face the consequences of these decisions. Good or bad, it does not matter, we face what we face to live our life the way we choose to live our life. So your life may not be like mine and that’s fine, no two people on this planet can live their lives exactly the same experiencing each moment in the exact same way. We are all facing our own life, learning our own lessons at our own pace. Whether you make the right decisions or wrong ones, you are on your own journey and this journey is for you to be on. Who else do you think should captain your ship? The role is yours, you just have to grab hold of the wheel and steer your ship towards your destination.
“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one” ― Bruce Lee
You may experience all sorts of terror, but this is for you to experience. These may seem terrible in the moment so much so that you have no idea what to make of this. But everything happens for a reason. You may not be at a point in your life where you understand what that reason is, but eventually, life will reveal itself to you. You could spend your entire life sitting in the corner of a room asking yourself “Why, oh Why!?”, and trust me, you would not be the only one doing this. Or you could come to a point in your life where you could let what happens to serve you or haunt you. When you get to this point, take a deep breath. Slap yourself across the face if you have to (this is a joke, but I have done it a few times). Dust yourself off and stop waiting for someone to come and do this for you. Things never go as planned for anyone. There is no set schedule for uncertainty, but you do have a limited amount of control over the uncertainty, and that’s with yourself. You may never expect what may hit you across the face, but you can be that crazy person who gets up each time feeling stronger and a whole lot more purposeful. Let what you have experienced show you the path because to know truly what the right decisions are for you, you must know what is wrong for you! This is your life, no one else is going to live it for you. Why wait any longer to live it? Grab the wheel and steer your ship towards your heavenly kingdom!
Invest in your existence, don’t give up hope and life may soon reveal itself to you
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P.P.S. If you liked this piece, maybe you would also like some of my other pieces:
